Skip to main content

Boarding school: the good, the bad, the ugly.

I remember highschool like it was yesterday. I spent my entire highschool experience at two different boarding schools. They both had a different experiences but there were a lot of similarities too.

Both boarding schools I went to were Christian boarding which meant that Sundays were spent at church or we had daily devotionals. I loved this, I don't think I would have grown so much in Christ if I did not go to boarding school. Also I made friends I want to keep for life,there is so much of my country I want to explore and more languages I want to learn.
The first boarding school I went to,we were allowed to really be creative,there were socials,art exhibitions, talent shows etc. There was a big singing and dancing culture too. This is where I discovered I loved to write. 

In the second boarding school they were more focused on developing a leader. It was very time and chore based. The seniors lead most activities and the way you presented yourself was important. My leadership skills really came to fruition there.

Now let's talk about the not so good . Firstly, homesickness, you will miss home in boarding school and this can make you really depressed. Secondly, is academic pressure. The reason your parents/guardians sent you there in the first place is because they want to see an improvement in your marks which can make the pressure double. You end up developing unhealthy studying mechanisms.
Thirdly, is peer pressure. There will be many decisions that you make,that you will regret because you want to fit in. Fourthly, which is something I hated is that the people put in charge of your well-being matrons,boarding executives etc. Will project their own perceptions and fears on you. For example,in the last boarding school I went to there was an obsession with how the girls dressed. We were constantly made to feel bad about what we wore, we were often sexualised by older males and bear in mind we were children.
Perceptions of beauty and spirituality were also placed heavily on us.

Depression and anxiety are also overlooked. We would spend huge chunks of our day sleeping and would mask it by saying we are "tired". Always having to be punctual, look in a certain way, having to adjust resulted in so much anxiety. Lastly, there is a big homophobic culture in boarding schools especially on the male side.

I asked a few of my friends on their boarding experiences. A lot of responses were positive. They mentioned having a sense of community,learning to be independent, diversity and being responsible as the biggest lessons from their experience. However,most of them mentioned not being able to trust people as a bad experience that they had.

Should you take your child to boarding school? It is up to you honestly. I do not regret going. It was the best solution for the situation I was. The experiences good and bad prepared me for so much.

Comments

  1. Unknown28 January 2022 at 01:34

    I love it ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

    ReplyDelete
  2. Unknown28 January 2022 at 01:36

    I really enjoyed reading this ❤️

    ReplyDelete
  3. Unknown2 February 2022 at 07:22

    Beautiful piece Amantle. You were always such an exceptional writer

    ReplyDelete
  4. Amantle3 February 2022 at 06:30

    This why it always good to highlight both sides. I am sorry for what you went through.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Are you lazy or just burned out?

Good day, my love bugs. In a world that glorifies productivity, resilience, and endless multi-tasking, many women find themselves quietly battling a double-edged sword: executive dysfunction and emotional burnout. These terms can be intimidating, but they are deeply personal and often misunderstood, especially in women with functional depression. What is executive dysfunction? Kendra Kubala from Healthline wrote in her article Understanding Executive Dysfunction and How It Shows Up that executive dysfunction disrupts the brain's ability to plan, focus, remember instructions, and manage multiple tasks. It affects the executive functions of the brain, which are skills that help us get things done. It is not laziness or lack of willpower. It is often linked to mental health conditions like ADHD, anxiety, depression, and trauma. For many women, executive dysfunction looks like: Starting tasks but never finishing them. Constantly missing deadlines or appointments Feeling overwhelmed ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Keep sane this festive

Good day, my love bugs. It is the festive season, and most people spend time with loved ones. Home is not also a place that many people look forward to, and if you have made the decision to spend this festive season by yourself, I am proud of you. Here are some useful tips for taking care of your mental health during the festive season 1. Set realistic expectations Am I the only one who feels like the feeling of the festive season has changed over the years? Do not conform to the pressure to create a holiday spirit or to have as good a festive season as the previous years. If we are also keeping it a buck, the holiday spirit that everyone celebrates is mostly created by women in the family who labor for it. Try focusing on the moments that matter most. By setting realistic expectations you relieve yourself from stress and pressure 2. Practice self-care Do not neglect your self-care routine during the holidays, considering that you have spent the majority of the year working on it. Cont...
Post a Comment
Read more

Spiritual bypassing and its danger to mental health

Kendra Cherry on Verywellmind describes spiritual bypassing as a tendency to use spiritual explanation to avoid complex psychological issues. My main issue with spiritual bypassing is the notion that one's struggle with mental health is a result of not practicing religion or spirituality enough. It is no surprise that when a person is going through a tough time they lean more on their spirituality and there is nothing wrong with that. However, it has come to my attention over the years how people use spirituality to deflect their trauma. Deflecting trauma Our brains work in amazing ways the human body is built to be sufficient. Our brain will block out certain events because it is trying to protect us from psychological stress. Spiritual bypassing is a way the self-harm or to promote harmony between people mentions Cherry. Spirituality is a force that helps an individual well-being however spiritual bypassing does not resolve the issue it merely glosses over the problem. Facing y...
Post a Comment
Read more